Coaching Perspectives
The desire to force outcomes is one of the most dangerous energetics at the heart of all human conflict and suffering. We try to ‘make things happen’ in our own way and in our own time, believing we have complete control over everything and everyone.
There seems to be a flawed notion that success comes from bending circumstances to our will when the real magic comes not from a change in circumstance but from a shift in perspective.
Perspective, not circumstance, creates reality. Change happens from the inside out. Shifting perspectives shifts reality. A shift in perspective means a huge shift in your energy, frequency, and vibration, which shifts everything around you.
Trying to force outcomes reflects a perilous mindset that leads to stress, frustration, and overwhelm. It is an energy that leads to excluding other perspectives; making up stories to fit our needs; fabricating, conflating, misinterpreting, or falsely interpreting information; making adverse inferences; overreacting to circumstances; catastrophizing, and missing opportunities that are right before our eyes.
It sends the message that you are the only one who can be trusted, which can wreak havoc on relationships.
Trying to force outcomes is a masculine frequency, energy, and vibration — an energy of ‘pushing through’ like a quarterback or eternally pushing up like Sisyphus. What the world needs right now is to embrace the feminine heart energy of flow — the elegant ease of simplicity and effortlessness
Attempting to force outcomes is rooted in the illusion of control. We convince ourselves that if we micromanage every detail and meticulously plan every step, we can be certain of success, but while preparation is important, no amount of preparation can ensure success. We cannot know what is around the corner. Insisting on certainty and control blinds us to the beauty of spontaneity, uncertainty, and surprise.
Attachment to an outcome leads to stress and anxiety. Constantly worrying about whether things will go according to plan can take a toll on our mental, emotional, psychological, spiritual, and physical well-being. Paradoxically, the more we try to force an outcome, the less control we actually have over both the outcome and our own peace of mind.
A rigid focus on a specific outcome blinds us to alternative possibilities and opportunities. Life is an energetic dance — dynamic, moving, evolving — and sometimes the most rewarding experiences come from surprises and unexpected turns. When we are too attached to a particular outcome, we fail to see the open doors, portals, and elegant pathways to even greater enchantment, magic, and love.
Instead of forcing outcomes, there is wisdom — world-changing wisdom — in learning the heart of surrender. This doesn’t imply passivity but rather a willingness to adapt and flow with the currents of life. Accepting that we cannot control every aspect allows us to be more present, resilient, and open to the richness of experiences that unfold naturally.
Life is an elegant, energetic, evolutionary dance. It is emotion — energy in motion. Embracing flow allows us to savor the beauty of the present. There is freedom in letting go of the need to force outcomes. It is liberating. We free ourselves to enjoy the journey and appreciate the growth that comes from facing challenges.
Resilience is born out of navigating uncertainty. Instead of forcing outcomes, we can develop resilience—the ability to bounce back from adversity. This mindset shift empowers us to view challenges as opportunities for growth rather than insurmountable obstacles.
While trying to force an outcome can be at the heart of human suffering, conflict, dis-ease, becoming aware of this dynamic can be a powerful coaching tool.
In a world that often glorifies control and certainty, there is profound wisdom in relinquishing the need to force outcomes. Life’s beauty lies in its unpredictability, and true success is found in the ability to navigate its twists and turns with grace. By embracing the flow of life, we open ourselves up to a world of possibilities, resilience, and authentic fulfillment. So, let go of the reins, trust the journey, and discover the magic that unfolds when we allow life to happen.
In the absence of this energetic, you begin to remember, reclaim, and embrace who you are – your essence, your frequency, your value, your heart values.
